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What You Shouldn’t Say To Friends Who Don’t Have Children

When a couple has children it is usually an extremely significant event in their lives.  The raising of children changes many aspects of the couples life.  One of the aspects that can be negatively impacted on is the friendships with couples that do not have children.  There are important things you should never say to a couple that doesn’t have children.

I Guess You Have A Pet

Pets can be a large part of a couples life.  However they are never a substitute for having a child.  You should never talk to a childless couple in a manner that sounds like it is a consolation prize for not having children.

When Do You Intend On Having Children?

Couples that have the blessing of children often want their friends to share in their wonderful experiences.  However, asking other couples about when they plan on having children in public situations is definitely a no-no.  There are a variety of reasons why couples don’t have children.  Sometimes they decide having children isn’t right for them. There could be medical problems such as infertility that the couple is facing.  If you want to discuss issues concerning why a couple isn’t having children you should very carefully and very discreetly bring it up only in private conversations.

I Guess You Get A Lot More Sleep Than I Do?

Couples with children are very often up during the night dealing with their children’s issues.  But the opposite is also untrue.  Couples generally do not decide to not have children because they want to sleep more at night.  Comments can sound like the couple is acting in a shallow or selfish manner.

We Always Wanted To Have A Family

This expression can be misinterpreted.  Childless couples, when they hear this expression, may believe you’re saying a couple who don’t have children are not a family.  There are many types of families.  Significant others, parents, brothers and sisters, cousins, all constitute family members.

New York Divorce Lawyers

If you are married and things don’t work out, you may need to get divorced.  In those situations the New York divorce lawyers at the Law Offices of Schlissel DeCorpo can help you out.  The divorce lawyers at the Law Offices of Schlissel DeCorpo have more than 100 years of combined legal experience in dealing with matrimonial and family law cases.  Among the various of matters handled by the Law Offices of Schlissel DeCorpo are divorce grounds, family lawchild custodychanging visitationchild abuse and child neglectdrafting separation agreementsprenuptial and post nuptial agreements.  We also have litigated cases involving mothers’ rights and fathers’ rightsThe firm has extensive experience in dealing with high net worth divorce issues. Call for a free consultation.

Mediating Your Divorce

mediation-150x150If you seek a non-confrontational approach to ending your marital relationship, mediation may be the route for you to take. Mediation is a type of Alternative Dispute Resolution (ADR), which can be a very cost-effective and efficient manner of amicably working out divorce related issues.

Mediation, Not Litigation

Mediated divorces are not litigated and there are no court appearances. A trained and neutral third party, usually an attorney familiar with matrimonal and family law, meets with the parties and reviews all issues with them in a non-confrontational manner. If the parties are mature, reasonable, and patient, mediation may be the best route to take with regard to handling a divorce case.

Divorces Where Mediation Won’t Work

Mediation, however, is not for everyone. Situations where the parties are not talking to each other or are not amicable do not present a good prospect for mediation. Cases involving very volatile relationships are also inappropriate cases for mediation. Further, domestic violence matters should not be mediated.

Mediation Requires Good Faith

For mediation to be successful both parties must be honest with each other. If either party hides assests or seeks to intimidate the other party, mediation is not going to work.

Divorce Can Be Difficult

Divorcing your partner can be a difficult process. Long term decisions need to be made on issues such as child custody, visitation (parenting time), spousal maintenance (alimony), equitable distribution of assets, dealing with business assets, valuing professional degrees, as well as the grounds for divorce. If you decide to use mediation, you should choose your mediator carefully. The Matrimonial and Family law attorneys at the Law Offices of Schlissel DeCorpo have more than 100 years combined experience dealing with all types of Matrimonial and Family Law issues. We are available to discuss mediation and other divorce related topics. Contact us for a free consultation.

Order of Protection Fails, Woman Shot

restrainingorder-150x150Carmen Valdez obtained an order of protection from her boyfriend, Felix Perez. She was assured by police officers that Felix would be arrested if he threatened her in violation of the order of protection, issued by the Bronx Criminal Court. Thereafter, Mr. Perez shot Carmen Valdez. Bullets pierced her face and her arm. Felix Perez killed himself with the same gun. Carmen Valdez sued the City of New York for failure to arrest Felix Perez and protect her pursuant the order of protection.

City of New York Not Liable to Carmen Valdez

The New York State Court of Appeals (New York’s highest court) in a 5-2 decision in the matter of Valez v. The City of New York, found that New York City would not be liable for damages to Carmen Valdez for her gunshot wounds. Even though she was assured by a police officer that her ex-boyfriend would be arrested when he threatened her, the City of New York still could not be held liable. The Court found that Ms. Valdez did not establish or create a “special relationship” between her and New York City based on the promise of a police officer to arrest her boyfriend when he threatened her on the phone. The court stated in its decision Carmen did not have “a justifiable reliance” on the City’s affirmative undertaking of the promise of the police officer to keep her safe. Even though Ms. Valdez, in compliance with her order of protection, reported to a police officer that her boyfriend threatened to kill her “the officer’s statement did not create a special relationship that would create liability upon the City of New York.” So much for the protection offered by an order of protection issued by a Criminal Court!

New York Divorce and Family Court Attorneys

The Law Offices of Schlissel DeCorpo have been protecting women involved in domestic violence situation, by obtaining orders of protection for them in both the Criminal Courts and Family Courts for more than 30 years. We also represent men and women in issues concerning child abuse, child neglect, divorce related issues, child custody issues, mother’s rights and father’s rights issues as well as drafting pre nuptial and post nuptial agreements. Feel free to call for a free consultation.

Is Marriage Obsolete?

More than 40% of the people in this country think marriage is obsolete! This is according to research study. People between the ages of 18 and 30 believe maintaining excellent parenting skills is far more important than being married. So, are marriages becoming obsolete? There are many issues that face couples who marry. One of them deals with unmet expectations.

Should Marriage Make You Happy?

Can your marital partner satisfy all your needs, emotional, psychological and sexual? It is difficult to meet expectations in marriages. Many men and women find after they are married they the end up with a low conflict and a low passion relationship. First there’s love intertwined with passion. Then there’s boredom, annoyances and the uncovering of flaws in your spouse. No passion sometimes leads to the parties in marriages having affairs.

Boredom

“Been there, done that” is a popular expression. When you spend a life with another individual, “been there, done that”, can be the order of the day. Kristen and Mark of the Kinsey Institute for Sex, Gender and Reproduction found that a quarter of all people who were interviewed were bored with their monogamous relationship. Another a quarter stated “they were on the brink of boredom”. Women tend to feel lonely when the love in their marriage fades. Men tend to feel “trapped”. Are marriages becoming obsolete because expectations are too high or is divorce simply becoming much easier to obtain?

No Fault Divorce In New York

In 2011, New York became the 50th and final state to adopt a true no fault divorce law. Prior to 2011, the grounds for divorce in New York were adultery, cruel and inhuman treatment, abandonment for a period in excess of one year and living separate and apart pursuant to written agreement of separation. New York now recognizes the grounds for divorce where the parties have irreconcilable differences for a period of six months. This is a true no fault divorce statute.

Although divorce grounds are no longer relevant, should your marriage fail, you will face issues involving child custody, visitation, division of property and child support. To avoid these issues should your marriage fail down the road, it would be in your interest to enter into a prenuptial agreement prior to marriage or a post nuptial agreement after your marriage.

Should you have questions regarding legal issues concerning marriage and divorce, feel free to call the Law Offices of Schlissel DeCorpo at 516-561-6645, 718-350-2802 or 1-800- 344-6431.

Saving Marriages After Adultery

adultery-150x150Adulterous relationships occur in approximately 50% of all marriages. The discovery of the adultery by the spouse can bring profound changes to the marital relationship. The betrayal causes pain and instability within the marriage. It is estimated that in less than a third of the situations involving adultery, the relationship between the couple ultimately returns to normal.

Handling Affairs

Dr. Tammy Nelson has recently written a book deals with how to successfully save relationships after the discovery of adultery. In her book, Dr. Nelson states “often affairs are like viruses, in that they’re opportunistic and they feed on a part of one’s self that is kept under ground, unknown even to one’s self.” Dr. Nelson discusses in her book reconnecting to the basic relationship between the parties.

She suggests the parties shouldn’t go into details about the facts of the affair. Instead, the couples should concentrate on re-connecting with each other. They should open up and deal with the insecurities and other problems in their relationship.

The Book: “Getting the Sex You Want”

Dr. Nelson, in her book, talks about the shame, anger and guilt experienced by couples when illicit affairs are discovered. She discusses the fact that an affair is usually an expression of sexual energy. She suggests the couple reinvent their relationship and deal with each others’ erotic needs. Forgiveness is not the answer to an affair. Re-establishing the relationship and dealing with sexual needs is more important.

This article discusses how to save a marital relationship. However, there are cases where the relationship can not be saved. In those situations, it is important to educate yourself with regard to the various issues involved in a divorce. The Law Offices of Schlissel DeCorpo

can assist you in these matters. We have developed an expertise involving issues related to family law, child custody, separation agreements, annulments, division of property, amicable divorce, fathers’ rights, mothers’ rights and the mediation of divorces.Call us for a free consultation at 1-800-344-6431, 516-561-6645 or 718-350-2802.

‘Genius’ Not Taken Into Account in Equitable Distribution

divorce-150x150Judge Dregger, sitting in Manhattan Supreme Court, denied a very successful private equity firm executive from presenting evidence in a divorce case that he had “unique personality traits” prior to the marriage that allowed him to accumulate 450 million dollars in business assets during the thirty year term of his marriage. Justice Dregger, in her decision, stated that “in purporting to prove that the success of the business is solely attributable to his innate genius, the expert opinion evidence offered by the husband provides no assistance to the finder of fact in fashioning an equitable distribution of the estate based on the contributions of each party to the marital partnership.” Mr. and Mrs. Silverman were married for more than thirty years prior to a divorce lawsuit being brought. They had married in January of 1978.

Innate Talents

Mr. Silverman claimed that he had unique innate talents that allowed him to be successful in this business. Mr. Silverman argued that his talents in business should be considered in determining equitable distribution. Justice Dregger stated that intangible assets may be considered as marital property, referring to the enhanced earning capacity of an investment banker, someone with celebrity status or someone involved in a political career. However, she stated the question is “to what degree the spouse not possessed of the intangible asset was entitled to a distributive aware arising from the enhanced earning capacity of the career developed during the marriage and not the degree of fame, skill or political acumen possessed at the time of the marriage.”

Henry Silverman is out of luck. The 450 million dollars he amassed is subject to equitable distribution with his wife. I’m sure he’ll end up with enough money to prevent himself from starving.

New York and Long Island Divorce Lawyer

The Law Offices of Schlissel DeCorpo have been handling divorces in the Metropolitan New York area for over thirty-three years. We litigate all aspects of divorce related proceedings in the Supreme Court and Family Court. These proceedings involve divorce grounds, no fault divorce, child custody, mothers’ rights, fathers’ rights, child support, downward modification of child support, spousal maintenance (alimony) and domestic violence issues. In addition, we negotiate separation agreements, prenuptial agreementsand post-nuptial agreements for our clients. We litigate equitable distribution issues involving doctor, dentist and lawyer licenses. Call us for a free consultation.

Violence In Judge’s Chambers During Florida Divorce

Kathleen Scott-Gonzalez appeared in court for a hearing on her divorce in Plantation, Florida. She expected this to be the final day of the trial on her divorce case. What she didn’t anticipate was that she would be beaten up by her husband in the judge’s chambers and end up with a broken nose and fractured jaw!

Kathleen and her husband Paul Gonzalez were in Judge Rothschild’s chambers. A hearing was underway concerning the issue of child support. Paul Gonzalez was acting as his own attorney. Both Paul Gonzalez and his wife Kathleen are ex marines.

Child Support

Judge Rothschild was talking about child support. At that time Paul Gonzalez stood up and left the room. Judge Rothschild invited both litigants into his chambers to discuss the matter. When Paul Gonzalez entered Judge Rothschild’s chambers, he started punching his wife. He was behind her and started punching her in the back of her head. Unfortunately, there was no court officer in the room to prevent the assault. Both Judge Rothschild and Kathleen Gonzalez’s lawyer helped stop the beating. Eventually court officers came in to the room and subdued Mr. Gonzalez.

Paul Gonzalez has been charged with felony battery and resisting arrest. He is currently spending his time in the Brownwood County jail. His bail has been set at one million dollars.

Kathleen Gonzalez advises men and women if they are afraid their spouse, even in a court setting, they should ask the court for additional security. Kathleen Gonzalez thought she was safe in court. In the case of her divorce, she wasn’t!

Father’s Rights Lawyer

Fathers should never represent themselves in a divorce. They should have knowledgeable father’s rights lawyers by their side at all times during matrimonial or family court proceedings.

The attorneys at the father’s rights Law Offices of Schlissel DeCorpo have extensive experience in dealing with issues involving paternity, child custody, orders of protection, child visitation and child support. We represent fathers wrongly accused of child abuse and child neglect by CPS and ACS. We deal with the attorneys for the child also in these proceedings. When fathers are downsized or lose their jobs, we bring applications to reduce their child support.

Our law office has extensive experience in dealing with parental relocation problems (when one parent moves), grandparent’s rights and equitable distribution of assets in a divorce. Our attorneys represent men in the Supreme Courts and Family Courts of Nassau County, Queens County, Kings County and throughout the rest of the Metropolitan New York area. Call for a free consultation.

Kathleen Scott-Gonzalez appeared in court for a hearing on her divorce in Plantation, Florida. She expected this to be the final day of the trial on her divorce case. What she didn’t anticipate was that she would be beaten up by her husband in the judge’s chambers and end up with a broken nose and fractured jaw!

Kathleen and her husband Paul Gonzalez were in Judge Rothschild’s chambers. A hearing was underway concerning the issue of child support. Paul Gonzalez was acting as his own attorney. Both Paul Gonzalez and his wife Kathleen are ex marines.

Child Support

Judge Rothschild was talking about child support. At that time Paul Gonzalez stood up and left the room. Judge Rothschild invited both litigants into his chambers to discuss the matter. When Paul Gonzalez entered Judge Rothschild’s chambers, he started punching his wife. He was behind her and started punching her in the back of her head. Unfortunately, there was no court officer in the room to prevent the assault. Both Judge Rothschild and Kathleen Gonzalez’s lawyer helped stop the beating. Eventually court officers came in to the room and subdued Mr. Gonzalez.

Paul Gonzalez has been charged with felony battery and resisting arrest. He is currently spending his time in the Brownwood County jail. His bail has been set at one million dollars.

Kathleen Gonzalez advises men and women if they are afraid their spouse, even in a court setting, they should ask the court for additional security. Kathleen Gonzalez thought she was safe in court. In the case of her divorce, she wasn’t!

Father’s Rights Lawyer

Fathers should never represent themselves in a divorce. They should have knowledgeable father’s rights lawyers by their side at all times during matrimonial or family court proceedings.

The attorneys at the father’s rights Law Offices of Schlissel DeCorpo have extensive experience in dealing with issues involving paternity, child custody, orders of protection, child visitation and child support. We represent fathers wrongly accused of child abuse and child neglect by CPS and ACS. We deal with the attorneys for the child also in these proceedings. When fathers are downsized or lose their jobs, we bring applications to reduce their child support.

Our law office has extensive experience in dealing with parental relocation problems (when one parent moves), grandparent’s rights and equitable distribution of assets in a divorce. Our attorneys represent men in the Supreme Courts and Family Courts of Nassau County, Queens County, Kings County and throughout the rest of the Metropolitan New York area. Call for a free consultation.

Marital Infidelity

marital-150x144Arnold Schwarzenegger, it was recently disclosed, had a child out of wedlock with one of his household employees. Arnold was able to keep it a secret from his wife, Maria Shriver, for more than a decade. Do career choices cause marital infidelity?

Arnold Schwarzenegger started his career as a body builder. He then became a movie star. He recently spent seven years as the governor of the State of California. It is my understanding that he is again looking at resuming his motion picture career.

Fame and Infidelity

If you are famous or rich, the financial aspects of infidelity are a lot easier to deal with. We continually read about movie stars who are sleeping around. These stories sell magazines and newspapers. They’re also excellent fodder for the gossip-type television shows that report these matters under the excuse that they are newsworthy events.

Morals

I personally don’t believe that certain career choices make it more difficult to maintain fidelity in a marital relationship. Individuals either have a basic moral structure or they don’t. Marital infidelity isn’t an issue solely for movie stars or the rich. The divorce rate in the State of New York is almost 50%. A large portion of these divorces are caused by marital infidelity. Although career changes and financial issues can cause stress, the stress itself is not what causes marital infidelity. Marital infidelity is caused by a lack of control. Careers that cause spouses to end up as trains passing in the night may be a factor in spouses seeking fulfillment outside of their marriage.

Although career changes can cause stress in a marriage, two individuals who love each other can overcome these issues. Sometimes career changes involve one party to a marriage becoming extremely successful. The successful person may have new opportunities for social climbing and his or her spouse may not be part of this new equation.

Although I am a divorce attorney, I’m a bit old fashioned about marriage and fidelity. Individuals should take their marital vows seriously and abide by them!

divorce-150x1502

New York and Long Island Divorce Lawyer

The Law Offices of Schlissel DeCorpo have been handling divorces in the Metropolitan New York area for over 33 years. We litigate all aspects of divorce related proceedings in the Supreme Court and Family Court. These proceedings involve divorce grounds, no fault divorce, child custody, mothers’ rights, fathers’ rights, child support, downward modification of child support, spousal maintenance (alimony) and domestic violence issues. In addition, we negotiate separation agreements, prenuptial agreements and post-nuptial agreements for our clients. We litigate equitable distribution issues involving doctor, dentist and lawyer licenses. Call us for a free consultation.

Valley Stream, Lynbrook, Baldwin, Malverne, Freeport, Oceanside, Long Beach, Elmont, Lakeview, West Hempstead, Hempstead, Merrick, Bellmore

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